Decluttering Our Apartment

[Alison] Entropy rules in my house. It's amazing how much stuff can fit in 600 square feet. I hired my sister to help me clean and release things. I had gifts from over 30 years ago that I never even liked, like a white terrycloth robe my brothers and I stole from the Hassler in Rome when we were children. My father was furious when four robes turned up on his hotel bill but by then we were back in NYC and it was too late. Truthfully, it was pretty ratty by 2008.

My sister said, "No, you don't have to keep that." I'm very grateful she didn't laugh hysterically at some of the things we turned up.

I notice that each thing I let go, each area that gets really clean, makes me feel lighter. Still I get to a certain point and then stop cold. Things build up again. I struggle on again with the cleaning. I don't know if I am afraid to finish because it would be such an unfamiliar state for my home. At the same time, I don't like feeling uncomfortable having people over and, when I walk inside, I am immediately exhausted. I know I have to resolve this but I don't know how. My husband doesn't care about it and that makes the work even harder. If my labor was appreciated, I think it would make a difference. Tomorrow was my promise to my women entrepreneurs' group but I'm not going to make it. I recommit again until I am finished... forward into the breach. Oy vey!